Thursday, January 24, 2008

The Scoop on Doggie Waste

All this talk about banning plastic bags got me thinking -- what will we use to pick up after our dogs? Today we use plastic bags from various stores. Whole Foods makes some of the best bags and in our house they have the honor of lining the kitchen garbage can, instead of holding doggie poop.

We shall be prepared for the day when plastic bags cease to exist, or at least cease to be cheap and plentiful. There shall not be a day Mother Earth is covered in dog poop, because we don't have plastic bags to pick them up.

We shall invent Biodegradable Doggie Waste Bags, for the sanity of dog people. We will distribute these bags at a low price.

There will be drop off points to collect filled-out-bags. They will be processed in a big machine and fuel will come out from the other end. People will line up to buy gas, made from doggie poop. Truck loads of money will be made from selling the energy.

This idea and write up about Biodegradable Doggie Waste Bags is copyrighted in California, in the month of January, in the year of 2008, to Bill and Vivian. If you are going to steal it and hit it big, don't forget where you got the food for thought.

Here is Bucky generating energy.


Paula said...

lOL! Oh my goodness I about fell off of my chair reading your post!
I love it!
We use the biodegradable doggie waste bags(which only means it takes 10 years to breakdown instead of 100, sheesh.) but still I would like to see something on the market that is as sturdy as plastic, inexpensive and does not imortalize our dogs dooings for eternity in the landfills!

Nichole said...

They do sell biodegradable doggie waste bags already... but I don't think they're very economical to buy (esp when you get all those freebies with your groceries every week)....

Lesley said...

You've sunk to new low! Posting photos of the dog defecating? For shame!

Cindy said...

Funny stuff. I make my bags work, though. I fill a bucket and then dump it into the bags:)

Jasmin said...

We only use the biodegradable dog poop bags at the park- at home we use the plastic grocery bags for the "big" cleanup days. We could (just as easily) double paper bags.I do like Cindy's idea, though.

If you get the blue biodegradable dog bags, they're less expensive (and stronger) than the green ones.

Sonya said...

I like your idea.

I will have to look around for those bags.

Jennifer said...

You are hilarious!! I will be sending all my doggie friends to read your dog poop manifesto! Bucky is still cute, even when he is producing clean fuels :)

Lesley said...

And I meant the previous comment as a joke.
Tried to delete it, but I can't

Diane said...

What a great way to power the world.

A farmer in our state uses the solid waste from his cows to heat his house, barn, and outbuildings. Plus he makes biodegradable planting pots out of it too. I'm out of luck because I'm sure my town wouldn't want me to keep cows on my one acre lot. Oh well.

Pooch said...

And, poor Bucky just has NO privacy, poor baby!

Jump over to my blog, Vivian! I have a button and MeMe for you!


Lynn said...

ROTFL!!! If they only could create fuel out of doggie poop, you wouldn't be able to find animal shelters since everybody would want to have an animal of their very own! No more strays!! See the politicians are looking at the wrong areas for world peace. They just need to come up with biodegradable plastic bags that will convert its contents into energy!
Great post Vivian!! LOL

Rhonda said...

Seriously LOL - great post!!!

Come on over when you can. I've tagged you for a meme!
Big Bang World Record

You don't have to play if you don't want to.

Hope you're having a great weekend.

Mindy said...

I love your sense of humor. I laughed out loud - hard - with your closing line and photo. "Generating energy." HAR!

Mary Mary said...

Dog poop for fuel makes way more sense than growing corn for fuel instead of food :)